Recently, a theme appeared in my office.
“Everyone is telling me I need to move on. “ “They want me to get over it.” “I feel bad talking about it anymore with my friends.” “I feel like I’m supposed to just let it go and act like it didn’t even happen and I can’t do it.”
The problem is not you. People tell friends or family to “move on” or “let it go” for reasons that have nothing to do with the person they are talking to and everything to do with themselves.
Here’s the reason why they say it:
They are uncomfortable with your feelings. They may want to fix it, but they can’t so they just want your feelings to go away. This is not about you or your inability to move on. It’s about their own discomfort with difficult emotions.
If you’re feeling stuck and unable to move on, getting support from friends, family or a therapist can help. If it’s trauma that keeps you stuck, EMDR can be life-changing. But sometimes the pace of our healing does not align with other peoples’ comfort or expectations and that’s okay.
Heal at your own pace. There’s nothing wrong with it. There’s nothing wrong with you.
You’ll move on when you’re ready.
The Team Behind the Message:
At Beach Cities Psychotherapy, our team of dedicated therapists truly care about your well-being. We are passionate about sharing valuable information to support and guide you on your journey. Whether you’re facing life’s challenges or seeking personal growth, our team is here to ensure you receive the compassionate care and support you deserve. We’re committed to helping you navigate through your concerns and are always here to take care of you every step of the way.
More From Us:
Fear of Pain — Is It Worse Than What You Fear?
I’ve been thinking a lot about pain — my pain, my client’s pain, my children’s pain and pain in general. We fear pain, avoid it with good reason— it hurts. We shelter our loved ones from it — sometimes stay in bad marriages to keep our children from feeling it. We...
Trauma Informed Therapy
Once upon a time, therapists told clients to go over all of the gory details of the horrific things they had been through because it would be therapeutic. They were wrong. Sometimes this can deepen the neural pathways to the trauma and even re-traumatize. The moment I...
Divorce is Trauma
In my practice, I often see people going through divorce or who have gone through divorce. I also work extensively with people struggling with trauma. Do these seem like two different things to you? They are not. Guess what? Divorce is trauma. This is how the American...